Antioch Ministries

This is the second blog in a series of three on running and marriage. The last race we ran was a New Year's Ultra Marathon. It started Dec 31 at 8:00 pm, and ended 8:00 am the next day. So what were we thinking? When we signed up for it, it sounded adventurous, fun and a little crazy, which is just our flavor.

We'll let's just say, it was crazy. We didn't account for: rain or dense fog that soaked you, freezing temperatures and running when you body wanted to be sleeping. I waited a good month before writing this blog, so I could gain a little perspective instead of just spouting out my immediate response which was, "I don't want to ever do that again!"

So with 30 days of perspective and a 70.5 mile race on the horizon, what can I say about running a race with my spouse? The hardest races are the most memorable and the most profitable.  As I glance back in my memory of the races we've run a couple really stand out. They were the longest, hardest and worst weather conditions. We ran a 13.1 mile (half marathon) it was hot, my feet were passed blisters, bleeding.  I cried that I never thought I would finish. We ran a 14 miler on a cold rainy day on a horse trail that was completely washed out.  We were covered in mud up to our knees, and my sneaker got suctioned into the mud at one point. It was miserable. We ran a 50K (30.6 miles) around a swampy lake trail. At mile 20 something, Jason accidently bumped into me when I stopped suddenly on the trail and I ended up in a bush. It wasn't funny at the time, but we laugh about it now. Each one seemed so difficult and uncomfortable at the time, but in hind sight, God was building something into me as a runner and into us as a couple.

There were so many training runs preparing for these runs. Some were 2-3 hour runs, and some short 20 minute runs. The easy, fun runs were great, but the remarkable ones were the ones that pushed us to the limit. With each step struggling to find it within yourself to push through, to take one more step. Freezing, shivering, wearing every piece of clothing I had brought with me, trying to will my feet to take one more step. These events were nearly unbearable in the moment, but truly memorable in retrospect. They gave new meaning to 1Thessalonians 5:16-17, "rejoice always, pray without ceasing." I realized, when I was really broken down, God could give me strength.

As I look back on those really hard races, I realized, being pushed to the limit physically and mentally really brings you to the point where you have to choose to be "in it together."  When you are sweaty, tired, hurting, and cranky, you are at your worst. It's easy at that point to snap at your spouse, to not be thoughtful because you are just trying to survive! At that point, you need to choose to be selfless, and ask God to pour on more grace, to work through the tough situations. Miles of pounding away, and intense fatigue showed that at our worst we have to make the conscience decision to work together or we would be divided. This concept applies not only to physical stress but emotional stress in arguments. Knowing in the midst of your frustration, when the enemy is throwing every spear he has your way, you have to choose to be in the boat together and mentally push through to find unity. I never thought at the beginning of our marriage that I would say, racing would produce in us unity and endurance. But, I challenge you, if you haven't done something physically challenging with your spouse, you should try it!